Comedian | Professor | Writer
(& Smartest) Arab
In my free time, I watch the news, and I like to think of the Palestinian cause and our political system. Just kidding. I never watch the news. It’s like watching the same film, over and over. It’s not just boring, but confusing too. Why would they show the same thing every day? And I hate the fact that after watching starving children in Africa, Yemen or Syria, we, as if nothing is happening, go on with our days, eat lunch, and complain about the food.
But I do want to talk about one glaring issue here in Gaza. The problem of the power cuts is not a political issue, so I can share what I think of it, especially that we can’t really grasp the politicians’ justification for what’s happening. So, here is mine, a more reasonable one.
At night, when the power goes off (and life turns into a scary movie named “The City of Darkness”), it is not because of a fuel crisis caused by the Israeli siege. No. The reason is that our politicians are super romantic. I am serious, again.
What do you do when you want to have a romantic night with your wife? (Of course, I’m a 22-year-old Arab girl, so I’m just guessing here.) Chances are you turn the lights off and light some candles. Well, the politicians in Gaza want us all to be a little more passionate. So they turn the whole city off, as if it’s their own room. They think to themselves, “We’re going to share these moments with our people and ask them to light candles too.” It’s as simple as that. If the power goes out during the day, it means many politicians want to share their moments with the public.
As a selfish citizen, I have only one complaint. I, as a single person, spend the whole night staring at the candle, melting with its heat, and I can’t help but imagine what those lucky politicians are doing at night. If the power was on, I would probably watch “Ellen” or “Friends.” But the power is out, and I’m all alone. The cuts are not fun for children either. They keep asking, “Why?” And I answer, “I can’t tell you, it’s R-rated.”
Finally, I admit I’m a bit envious. I have been unsuccessfully trying to “affect” (maybe “ruin”) my ex-boyfriend’s life for some time, while our beloved politicians, through their romantic instincts, are influencing 1.8 million lives every day.